Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Dear Diary 20

Dear Diary,

My husband and I went to our weekly couple's meeting last night. It was a lot deeper than usual. Our facilitators have hit us with a lot of topics, but yesterday was different. We talked about how things that we have gone through in our past affect our relationships.

One of my favorite people in the group is a man named Louis. Louis is a man's man and his wife says that he is a wonderful husband and father. He was the first man to speak up. It's very hard for men to talk about their feelings and it took some prodding from the women to get one of them to talk. Louis decided to be the one. As a mother it broke my heart to hear him say that he never really knew his mother.

Louis lived with his mother until the age of seven and then was sent to his father. His mother said she could not "handle" him. He is in his forties and still doesn't know what that means. To make a long story short, Louis still longs for a mother. He really feels that he missed out. His mother passed away before he could ask her any questions. They barely spoke.

I take my job as a mother seriously. It boggles my mind to think that someone just would not want to be bothered with their child. I know there are times when things cannot be avoided and I am in no way judging anyone. I just don't know if my life would be worth living without my children. I think of all the mothers who have outlived their children and my heart goes out to them. I cannot even begin to imagine how they make it through the day.

My prayers go out to the sister of Jennifer Hudson. She has been on my mind since I heard that her son's body was found. I know that mother's lose their children every day, but it has to be extremely hard to see your tragedy play itself out on television.

Being a mother is a serious responsibility that needs to be cherished.

Until tomorrow....

4 comments:

SLC said...

I'm with you sis. I can't imagine giving up any of my children, and I definitely can't imagine losing one of them. It's scary to think that 3 of my four children or older than Julian, and until now I've never even imagined losing them tragically.

It's great that Louis was able to open up. I'm accustomed to hearing this story flipped; daughter without daddy, so his perspective is definitely different.

Wish my wife and I could've been there.
SLC

Strongblkwmn said...

It's a really great group and it has helped our relationship. We're learning a lot. I'm glad we decided to go. Everyone is really nice and the men participate a lot more than their wives expected them to.

We've been together a long time, but it's never too late to learn about one another. We all change from day to day.

A Free Spirit Butterfly said...

It wasn't until my husband left me in 2006 since that I finally made peace with my mom. I resented her for so many reasons and when I really needed her, she opened her heart to me like she "was my mother" I finally realized that she "was my mom" good, bad or indifferent, I love her and she loves me. Now the sister's are jealous because I'm her "new favorite" smile.

On another note, my heart is sadden for the Hudson family and all I can say is God is near!

Shanita Waters said...

I've heard women say this about their little boys before and never understood it. I don't understand how they can come to a point where they feel they can't handle them but I thank God that they send them to live with their fathers or other relatives rather than abuse or mistreat them. There is always a bright side.
Your couples meeting sounds very interesting...