Friday, July 9, 2010
Ain't life grand? You have to get with it. There is absolutely no choice. Even when you don't feel like making that lemonade. Most of the time I feel like taking those lemons and throwing them back at the universe, but it's just not a option. I have to keep on moving.
Sometimes I wish things were always easy. I have to keep reminding myself that there is no testimony without a test. Life has to be about learning from your mistakes and Lord knows i've made a lot of them. Some I didn't even know about. I thought I was doing a pretty good job and found out that I sucked. LOL! It hurt me to the core but I learned a valuable lesson.
I know I have not been the perfect mother, wife, sister, daughter, or friend but i've done my best. I'm confident that the people I love know how I feel about them. I may have been too much of a disciplinarian, or not catered to my husband enough. I didn't always have the patience that was required or keep in touch the way I should have. I'm still a good person, though flawed.
There are just some who feel that the world revolves around them. Some who have an overblown sense of entitlement. I have learned to accept that in some of the people I love and move on. I will not be the receptacle for their narcisstic view of the world. Do you boo, just not on my time.
I have to learn how to just do me. I've battled worried chick syndrome for a long time. At one point I had it under control, but it's coming back. I'm not happy about that at all. I'm missing out. I think, think, think, and by the time i'm done i'm too exhausted to move. It's just in me and I can't shake it.
I'm doing my best. I've learned to try and find that quiet space in my mind when people, places, and things start to get to me. I shall overcome. Life is too damned grand to even think of doing anything else.